Living with Bipolar - Self Care

I can't change the fact I have Bipolar, I have accepted that this is with me for life. At some point in the future it will challenge me again and each time it does I pray I have the strength to come through the challenge. There is something I can change though and that it my attitude towards my condition and how I manage self care.

Self care is important for each and everyone of us. I feel as someone living with Bipolar that I am more aware when I haven't practised my self care effectively and have little room for slacking. My body and mind are quick enough to let me know if I have been slacking, I am gradually getting better at listening. So where do I start with self care;

Diet

Caffeine, sugar and alcohol all affect our energy levels and mood. It doesn't take much thinking to see how this can be negative for someone with Bipolar. Small amounts of sugar and alcohol work fine for me (when I am well) but caffeine is most definitely not my friend. This is personal for each of us, just listen to your body. Now my diet has changed slowly over time. I first became vegetarian at 13 years.
I researched diet a lot when I was first diagnosed and came across evidence of diary affecting moods in women due to its hormone content. I thought it was worth a shot and removed dairy from my diet to see if my moods would be affected (I was willing to try anything) and noticed a real positive difference.
I went to a documentary evening with my father a couple years ago regarding the affects of wheat, more so for my father as he was expressing concern about wheat in his diet but I left committed to ensuring the majority of wheat in my diet was removed and my energy levels increased!

Personally I find a vegan diet with little/no refined sugars and little wheat (our local town has an amazing sourdough bakery it is just too tempting) does the best for me. We cook from scratch with very little processed foods and it feels just right for me. As I've already said self care is very much a personal thing, however you reach it a balanced, nutritious diet is a must!

Exercise

A basic online search of exercise and mental health will bring up all the evidence gathered (there is quite a bit by the way) regarding the positive effect exercise has on our moods and well being. We don't have to run miles daily (thankfully) to feel the benefits. A walk around the block or basic yoga routine are great places to start and really make a difference.

Essential Oils

Essentials oils are used daily in our home, I might not work as a Complementary Therapist anymore but it is very much a lifestyle for me. Now care must be taken when using essential oils especially if pregnant, breastfeeding or on medication. Visiting an Aromatherapist for a massage can be a relaxing and enlightening experience but understandably isn't for everyone. Oils can be used at home in baths, oil burners even on jewellery but ensure you buy high quality oils and gain advice from a qualified practitioner. My personal favourites regarding my mood are Rosemary, Basil and Frankincense. Oils are very personal though so this is most definitely not set in stone for everyone experiencing Bipolar Disorder. Oils can be used for colds, headaches, gaining focus, sleep and even cleaning your home so maybe now is the time to bring some natural oils into your home and bathe in their benefits. 

There are some good books available on Aromatherapy, the link is to a rather good one - take a look!

Always buy high quality, organic essential oils.

Sleep

Late nights happen, broken sleep with two young children happen, not every night can be a blissful 8 hours of deep beautiful sleep but oh my imagine if it was......anyhow getting tired is not good for mental health. I can handle a late night but more than two in a row I can feel it. More than three or four and I am clearly slipping for all to see. Now everyone needs sleep this is no different because I have Bipolar I just feel more aware and sensitive. The majority of people will feel grumpy if they do not sleep, find themselves reaching for the sugar snacks or caffeine to keep going and that's understandable. Unlike the majority of people tiredness for me dramatically increases the risk of me falling into a deep depression. Ensure you rest when you can, there is no shame in going to bed at 7pm if you're tired, say no to that evening out with friends and put yourself first, grab a nap if you get a chance anything to ensure you are getting enough sleep.

If you do have trouble sleeping an essential oil blend in a warm bath or diffuser, Chamomile or Valerian tea, meditation, avoiding screen time for an hour before bed as well as sugar and caffeine can all be of help.

Company 

Negative people spread negativity so surround yourself with positive people. Active, self motivated people are much more beneficial as friends than those always seeking drama and looking for something to moan about. This goes for family too, you do not have to spend time with negative people just because they are family. You might find when you are feeling good you can brush off their negative vibes but if you are tired or feeling low you can absorb them all so easily and become dragged down by it all. Say no to seeing these people (if they must be in your life) or limit contact when you are struggling. Even better remove them from your life if you wish, just work on surrounding yourself with positive people  everyday!

Social Media/News

I have written previously about social media and the negative effects I have found it has on my mood and the news is exactly the same. As with other things the effects are increased if I am tired or low but even on my best days social media and the news seem to just bring an unsettled, doubtful feelings to mind. These can be avoided dramatically if you choose to do so, many of the checking social media and news sites can be a habit, like all bad habits they can be difficult to break. Tell someone of your plans, delete social media accounts, unsubscribe to news channels and listen to music through the many methods other than through radio stations with regular news updates and you will be well on the way to breaking the habit. If you slip that is OK just hop back on and try again, no need to beat yourself or feel guilty, habits are hard to break but once you have you will feel even stronger.

Acceptance and Trust

Whatever your belief system might be having trust that you will be OK can totally change your approach to Bipolar and I personally found removed a large amount of the fear associated with becoming unwell. Acceptance was a big thing for me in the beginning and occasionally it can rise again but I feel this is perfectly understandable when you have a lifelong condition whatever it may be.

This is a very personal topic which is unique to each and everyone of us whether diagnosed with a life long condition or not so I will leave it to your own reading and journey to see how this works for you. As acceptance and trust helped me so much I felt it should be mentioned, even if just to stir some thoughts around the subject.

Gratitude

Gratitude when in the depth of a depression can be tough. In my lowest moments I have become overwhelmed with guilt for all that I have, to me I don't deserve it and I am wasting it. Acceptance and trust eased a large amount of the intense guilt for me. Each and every day I list things I am grateful for and on tough days they are as basic as I can breath, I have a warm home and I had clean water to drink today but I am thankful for those days as they keep me grounded, after all it is those basics which allow me to have enjoyable days. Thankfully I have many more good days than bad but how many people forget the basics - forget how blessed we are to have clean drinking water straight to our homes! Gratitude is something I work hard to teach our children, to me more people need to remember what they have, I feel society is great at forgetting what we have and focusing on what we haven't. Take a moment to read this short post linked to this subject.

No!!

No can be a hard word to say but it is OK to say it, the more you do the easier it becomes. Do not push yourself to do things because you 'should'. If you are tired and want a night in then say no when your work friend invites you out for a film, it is not rude it is self care. Arrange to do it another night and you'll both enjoy it much more as you'll both have the energy to do so.

Listen to your body, it knows what it needs if you just tune into its signs. Your body gives these signs as it has your health as top priority, sadly the 'should' voice in your head does not!

Talk

When times are tough talk! I know I personally do not want to talk when I am in the depths but having someone in my house keeps me safe, even if at the time I am annoyed they are there it makes sense once the fog clears. Remember it always clears. I have a tattoo on my collar bone to ensure I never forget - this too shall pass!

Just saying I don't feel well/safe/right is enough!

Bipolar UK have an online community if you would like to speak to others in similar situations. Personally I have felt frustrated by others without Bipolar trying to 'get it' as I am not sure you ever can get a condition without experiencing it. When I was first diagnosed the online community helped me greatly to not feel alone.

The Samaritans are available all day every day if you need someone to talk to.

Talk. Stay Safe!

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Life is a personal journey, whether a life with Bipolar or a life without. This is my approach to self care which as I grow will undoubtedly change and adapt but right now this works for me and some of it may work for others also so please do share and if you wish share some of your self care advice with me.

Couldn't have worded it better!

No shoes for me please

Three years ago I brought my first pair of barefoot shoes after much research and shopping around. I've never been keen on shoes, always happy to have them off and feel the ground on my feet. Even before I learnt about spiritual connection and grounding with the earth I just knew it fel nicer to be barefoot!

I now wear nothing else if I do have shoes on they are barefoot shoes and the same for our children who love them. Our youngest was always taking her shoes off at any opportunity now if we are out all day her shoes actually stay on!

Now the science behind this is rapidly growing and more and more people are making the shift to barefoot footwear. Whether running, working in the office or socialising with friends there is a style to fit. We only buy from the vegan range but there are plenty of other options available to suit all lifestyles.

So get researching, fill your mind with barefoot knowledge and see what the fuss is all about, I promise you it is well worth it.

Who is with me?

The world of Pinterest brought this to me today and it sat so well with me and related beautifully with how I feel so I wanted to share it with you. I know I cannot be alone in this! 

Creativity - Are you in there?

It has taken me to my thirties to really embrace my creativity, really dig deep and try new things. When I look at the results I am a little proud of myself instead of overly critical. It took me 15 years since I left school to do something creative because I enjoyed it, found it relaxing and just wanted to do it, no pressure just for the fun of being creative. The girl who dropped art at 13 years of age because in my mind I was clearly no good at it (my grades were terrible) actually enjoys being creative. It feels nice, relaxes me and bring me enjoyment. I wanted to do art in school, my work never got the grades though and unless I got the high grades what was the point in doing it - this was the mindset at school. Grades, grades, grades, enjoyment does not come in to it. 

Why can't children be creative just for the fun, its amazing for mental health and confidence but the opposite occurs when you starts grading children on the results of their creativity. 

Confidence is a big issue for many adults and I have lost count how many times I hear it linked to school experiences and grading. Instead of grading our children at such a young, vulnerable age why can't we encourage them for their focus, trying time and time again until it finally clicks and for helping one another get their heads around new, exciting topics. Encouraging team work instead of separating children based on their grades and praising the higher graded children more so than those with lower grades would surely have a positive impact on self esteem, community and teach these much needed life skills. 

Grades can be important later in life but lets not forget the person underneath the grades. 

Now in my thirties I am going to enjoy my creative side, allow my creative confidence to grow knowing there is no mark sheet in sight and you know that feels really great!